It feels like forever since I've written anything. I've had so much on my mind lately and sometimes I just feel like giving up, honestly. My mind is moving faster than what my body can handle, and at the same time my memory has seemed to start failing me. I don't know what to do anymore.
My two and a half year anniversary is today (technically since it's almost 4AM) and it feels so much shorter than that. So much has gone on in our relationship...so much good yet so much bad. When it comes to a certain time of the year, I think of all the bad things that had occurred rather than the good just because it seems like the bad overtook the good in most ways.
For example, the autumn months of October and November remind me of my senior year of high school and how much "fun" it was in my drama class.
The wintry months of December through February remind me of my own "dark ages" where I can not really comprehend anything but being depressed and crying almost everyday.
The spring reminds me of love, since that's when I met him...early April to be exact.
And lastly, the summer is filled with both good and bad. Good because I had never truly felt so adored in my life, and bad because that's when our first break up was.
We got through it all though, and I feel as though fate had a part in it.
Before him, I doubted that there even was a God out there...then I started praying more. To this day I question the decisions our Father has brought upon us, but at the same time I thank him for every second of them. The world works in mysterious ways...
Be Peaceful. Be Free.
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